i'm       human      /      sarcasm      is      my    only      defense!

IRIS     »         bewitchedluck‌.

_{“Not denying that I’m A BIT crazy, but cough it up.  Did you or did you not have curly fries for lunch?  I mean, that’s the only question, because you DEFINITELY smell like magic. … How else do you explain the fact that all the supernatural creatures are ATTRACTED to you?”} 

              “did i ——NO!” okay, no, he absolutely had eaten curly fries earlier in the day. stopped in at that old diner & gotten a good heaping helping of them. “want to hear it in spanish? NOH.” but he falters, jaw snapping closed with an abrupt click of teeth, & eyes narrow contemplatively against her frame. “who says they’re attracted to me? what even — how did we —- look, i’m not denying that i’m not involved in a lot of activity, but that’s just circumstance. i’m also fairly positive that they’re all being drawn in by that magical stump growing out in the preserve…” 

IRIS          »              bewitchedluck‌.

_{“I’m guessing his magic either smells like old forests or CURLY FRIES.” @ofthychaos / @anxietyfought​}

         "whoa, no, okay just —– no. hold on a second here because i’m absolutely positive that you’re not firing on all cylinders here. ———- ESPECIALLY if you think i smell like curly fries OR MAGIC.“  

iris        /       bewitchedluck‌. 

“and Stiles didn’t choose YOU.”

        “oh, but didn’t he?” the smile that splits void’s lips is dark. saturated with contempt and simmering ire. “truth be told, stiles   doesn’t   know WHAT he wants —— but i do.”

          “our choices seal our fate “  

@bewitchedluck , song , called. 

iris    /     bewitchedluck‌.

“c’mon, it’ll be fine !!  it’s just a small knick.  if everything goes to hell, I’m a big girl.”  honestly.  it’s not as if she was a sorceress or anything, capable of blasting most supernatural monsters away from her ( unlike a few werewolves that were currently in the hospital ).  she reaches for the cursed knife he confiscated, rolling her eyes.

        “how is any of that fine?” he’s not giving it back, in fact, he pointedly pulls the affronting thing further away from her grubby hands. why, in moments like this, did he have to be the sensible one? this just had to be the universes sick sense of a joke. “no, listen, i get it. well sorta. ——-  you’re such a scary witch. you’ve got charms and spells and shit for days. and i’m not questioning you on THAT, but, you can’t just. walk up and STAB everything that offends or threatens you. it’s a disaster waiting to happen!!” 

           “yeah, how about we don’t?” he says while rightfully plucking the sharp object out of her hands. seriously, how did this become his life?

@bewitchedluck , called. 

iris     /    bewitchedluck‌. 

“  hey,  listen.    you  know  you  can  crash  here  for  as  long  as  you’d  like,  and  they  are  utter  idiots,  but  they’re  YOUR  idiots.”    the  amount  of  phone  calls  she’s  rejected  and  the  cloud  of  gloom  that  hung  around  @anxietyfought-archive was  beginning  to  worry  her.

            the line crackles with static, a feat that has him yanking the receiver away from his ear in favor of glowering at it. " ‘m sorry, but are you like in a storm or something?” nope. it’s probably her magic again his mind supplies after another moment of infuriating white noise. god. “my idiots, sure —- just do me a favor and never repeat that in front of ANY of them. pretty sure none of that would end well. for either of us. but yeah, thanks. i appreciate it.——  i’m actually.” he stops, and leans forward enough to see the skyline through the jeep’s windshield. “about 15 minutes out….”